WE ARE HOME!!!

It happened all too quick, but we are so blessed with a very speedy return to the US. I want to thank all of you who have been keeping up with us and I am going to finally slowly but surely post the pictures I have been wanting too for the last month. I will write more of our rapid/lucky journey home later. Alejandra is doing very well. Every day is a little bit better and we are all learning. We are thrilled to be a family again!!! Ok, got to run!! More later!! Thank you for all of your prayers, thoughts and wishes, that is what truly got us home!!!! Sincerely, Janet

Bright Sunday!!

I am almost scared to say but today was by far the best Alejandra and I have spent together. I think, but am really tentative to write it, I think we may have turned a major communication corner. Not that my spanish has improved any at all in the last 24 hours but it seems like she is getting the idea of "using her words" instead of temper tantrums or attitude to tell me what she wants. We started the day out practicing some letter writing in a coloring book I brought down. It is evident she has NEVER practiced any form of letter or number writing but she is very receptive to learning. Much more than Rachael ever was at this age or even now! After that we hung out for a bit and made a journey into town to the Bodengona (shopping market) to get some much needed laundry detergent. On the way back we stopped for coffee and snack at the central park and then headed home. Later I had planned for us to meet some friends at the pool, which is quite a long walk. When I got the stroller out again, she said, NO, yo quiero caminar! "I want to walk"...well OK, and we walked 3/4 the way until I flagged a Tuk Tuk trying to head off impending fatigue. At the pool, our friends didn't show but she was happy as a clam playing with me and doing her near drowning activities. We then had lunch and I was sweating on how to get her to mabe play on the little adjoining park so I wouldn't have to get back in the pool. Unbelievably, she agreed to go change, shower (I was so excited because at the hotel swimming pool locker room is my one chance per week to get a really good hot shower!!) and then go to the park! It worked like a charm. We then started walking back and she was a real trooper. I know she was tired and at one point she sighed and sat down and said "descansa?" (can we rest?), not to compare but this was a refreshing change from a meltdown or a typical Rachael moaning/crying "I just can't go on anymore". So we rested and then walked a little more. I flagged another Tuk Tuk and we then spent the rest of the afternoon evening at my friend Patricia's house. One of the big switches today was she wanted me happily to do almost everthing with her. Yes, this is a little exhausting, but she really seemed to want "my" company instead of tolerating me just because I am the mean old Momi and someone who just wont go away. I wasn't on edge all day waiting for her to meltdown or get angry. So, yes, a huge difference in one week alone together. I do remain a little guarded as I know we will go through many many transitions. I attribute today to the thousands of prayers, and positive thoughts all of our friends and family are sending us. I am not doing this alone. It is because of my faith and the faith of so many loved ones we have. Just when I think I can't hardly do this anymore, I receive a day like today. Thank you!

The Aurora Zoo

Yesterday, we went for a big trip into the city to see the Zoo with some friends. We invited Ruth, her daughter Lesbia and her grand child, Myellie. My good friend Patricia, her mom, and her three children went as well. We started the day with Ruth and family arriving in a Tuk Tuk, then we all walked to Patricia's. The van was waiting and for the first time ever for me in Guatemala, it was a female driver and her lovely daughter Rana. The vans are like mini VW buses with two bench rows and extended fold out seats on each row. The trip in was fairly quick no real traffic. I had never driven with such a cautious driver here. Usually, you wonder how many autowrecks you avoided on your journey or how many you may have created. But Rebecca our driver drove with the utmost of care, a nice change of pace. Once at the Zoo, priorities first, bathrooms and Pollo Campero for lunch! If I had'nt already posted Pollo Camero is the nation's craving. It is similiar to Kentucy Fried Chicken but different. It is ok. People here say it absolutely grows on you but this is my first time ever having a piece other than a bite of someone else's. Fully fueled on Guatemalan's fast food finest we entered the park. Much to my surprise it was a very open airy Zoo. Safety is not a huge concern in Guatemala so there weren't any high fences or walls really. Mainly, there were water motes (sp?) to keep you from the animals. Therefore the animals seemed very close. The main attractions for me were a male lion with the biggest mane I have ever seen; a white peacock; two beautiful jaguars; an elephant that walked on a 6 inch curb (width) 10 ft high above a mote; the monkeys (can't remember the type, but very entertaining); a completely scary python that must have just eaten a small goat, he was huge!; and the little rides that the kids and adults went on. OK, more on that. For all my friends back home, you can picture the little scary rides they set up in front of K-mart? The Zoo had something similiar but of course even less safe if that is possible. But Jacilyn (Patricia's 7 yr old) was an expert there so she took Alejandra directly onto the scarriest little roller coaster and Alejandra loved it. Next thing you know she rode it again, then with Ruth, then Patricia and her kids, then Lesbia and her 15 month old!!!! I graciously decided to watch the strollers, camera's ect!! (there are no height or age restrictions when riding these things). After that it had pretty much been a full day and we strolled back out to where the van was waiting. The trip back was about 2 hours because of traffic. Once we were back it was dinner and lights out!! Alejandra did well for the day. Only a few bouts of attitude. She loved all the animals. It was the first time that I felt like she knew who Momi was and I was not just another care giver to her. It wasn't that she was super affectionate or incredibly happy that I was there, it was just that she knew who to look to to show me certain animals or what to do, when to do. Today, will be the first time I have been to the pool with her alone. In the past she has issues with first arriving, being asked not to do certain things (that are dangerous) ect. So today will be another good test of how we are doing. Overall, I think we are continuing to make baby baby steps, although compared to a week ago, when I really look back she has made huge gains. Last Sunday is what I call Black Sunday, when Grant and Rachael left. We will see what today brings!!! Tomorrow afternoon we find out when our Visa appt is set. Right now they are setting them into June (ugh). So all the prayers and positive thoughts are welcome and much appreciated as we would love to get home earlier! Janet

What goes around, goes around!

A quick post as I am too tired today to keep my eyes open, however, this was worth writing down. If ONLY I could post the picctures!!! Today, we started out with our normal routine. I now have Alejandra hooked on smoothies. She thinks she gets ice cream for breakfast. No wonder she is a dream in the morning! After lunch today as we were hanging out with Ruth, Alejandra starts telling Ruth that her "munecas" (dolls-barbies) are showing bad behavior (portate mal!) So as I am listening, I tell her well, you should put them in the time out chair. She grinned from ear to ear, set up two chairs, gave them a lecture and then I pretended to be a voice from the dolls..."I am sorry Momi" which she made them repeat and then they were free to play. It was a crack up and because Alejandra is now an expert in the time out chair, she passed it right on!!! Ruth just stood there laughed and shook her head. In reality, I think it has been two days since Alejandra actually had to sit there. We are now cutting off the meltdowns with just a few words. Ok, I have to sleep!! More this weekend. We are making a big trip to the Zoo on Saturday with some friends. I invited Ruth and her grand daughter to join us. Should be fun!! Thanks for continuing to think of us and check in!!

Communication is Key!

It takes a village but I think we are making a lot of progress in just three days!! Today was even better than yesterday as far as minimal meltdowns. I would like to take responsibility but I can’t. Alejandra is responding to reasoning and lack of attention during her melt downs. Today during both brief episodes either Ruth or my Spanish instructor were here to back me up on telling her that she needs to behave and be polite. They are able to say things to her that I can’t, even the most simplest reasoning. Hearing it from another adult helps anyway. So what would have been major drama was 3 minutes of me clinching my jaw wondering what would happen. And luckily, all was well. She went to her little preschool in the morning for two hours which she LOVES. The rest of the day was with me ( arts and crafts, 500 books, stroll around town trying to download docs for the embassy) until this evening we hung out with friends for about and hour. Bed time routine is amazingly easy. She seems very eager to have this routine and go to bed. Lots of hugs and kisses today and just smiling eyes were a huge reward. She is very eager to learn counting and writing her name. She truly has an engineers mind. She has to figure it out herself and do it herself. The other key is structure. I think she craves it, so now our days are divided up into little blocks of time. On the paperwork front, we were submitted to the embassy today and the big question is..will they issue Pink Appt. in 48 or 72 hours? I keep hearing conflicting reports. I will count on 72 and then some probably. So onward!!! Thanks for all of your many prayers and thoughts…it is definitely working!!! Antigua is truly a simple life. I don't really know the stats but the town is very small. It takes me about 20-25 minutes to get to the other side, walking of course. I like walking everywhere..to the market, to get coffee, to run to the bank. All of the streets are either a rough cobblestone type or a very broken concrete or dirt. The jogging stroller I bought from the woman before me is remarkable. I think I am atleast the third generation and that thing is TOUGH. We have been over everything in it!! The people here are all very nice and seem to enjoy having foreigners in their town. Ruth rides her bike down a huge and very steep, rutty dirt road from a neighboring town to get here. Her bike must weigh about 50lbs with no gears, going up is home is all up hill. She arrives immaculate everyday with a huge smile, willing to help in any way she can. She lives with her husband, daughter and son. Her other daughter lives in Antigua with her husband and the first grandchild, Myelli (Michelle). Every Sunday they have lunch together, her husband has lived all his life here and his family before him ect. They are incredible people making a lovely life out of practically nothing material. They have two parrots, three dogs and two cats. Lunch with them last Sunday was a very special treat. We looked through family photo albums, talked about the families she has worked for ect. Ruth's youngest daughter spoke very good english so we talked for most of the time. I just absolutely admire Ruth and how she lives, her values, character and incredible work ethic. This time has been an experience I could have never imagined and it continues to open my eyes to things I have been too busy in my own life to see. Ok, enough rambling (too much caffine tonight). More to come!!

Que Buena Chica!

Early Sunday morning, 3:30 am to be exact, Grant had to leave and we loaded a sleeping Rachael into the car with him. Little did she know that she was headed back home. We made the decision late Saturday night that both girls 4 and 5 would be too much for me. Alejandra was starting to show some not so great behavior and that compounded with Racheal's " too exhausted to speak" meltdowns, we decided to nip disaster in the you know what and call it a day. It was a really tough decision but the right thing to do so I could focus on Alejandra and basically institute a mini boot camp on proper behavior and respect for adults and others. So after trying to hide sobbing all morning on Mothers day from Alejandra we went through our first day alone together...and boy was it a marathon! Whether she was coping with Papi and Sissy being gone, having to spend one on one time with mean old Momi (who tows a strict line) or everything in between, I wasn't quite sure which one of us would survive the day! Whew! So we started day two together not much different. However, low and behold after the second horrendous meltdown she came around and we had a blast for the rest of the day. Granted we did not stop playing, going to the parque, meeting friends for dinner and running home trying to beat the dark in the rain....regardless we did it!! And both go to bed with a smile on our faces!! Who knows what tomorrow will bring but atleast we had today without constantly going head to head!! On other news...we (not surprisingly) did not get submitted for Pink today, supposedly we will be "first" tomorrow. This pretty much blows the entire week for anymore progress, so I am already looking to next week to see what can be done. Oh well, more bonding time for Sissy and Momi!! Hope everyone's week starts out right!! More on lunch at Ruth's house tomorrow!

Passport down, Pink to Go!

We were able to get Alejandra's passport today and now will be able to submit our paperwork to the embassy on Monday. Alejandra enjoyed her trip to the city with Papi. Rachael and I stayed behind and hung out with Ruth most of the day. Tonight's bedtime routine was flip flopped from last night with Alejandra melting down but we know both girls were exhausted and in the end they end up going to sleep so such is life. Drugs are good, because I feel like a real person again after being on antibiotics for 24 hours! I might even be able to sleep tonight with my head in a semi-horizontal position! Have a great weekend! We will be breaking the news to Alejandra that Papi must return home, so that will be tough, but there is strength in prayer and you better believe I will be on my knees tomorrow night!!!

Feliz de Madre Dia!

First and foremost, happy Mothers day to all of you Moms out there and Moms to be. Ours started out a little ruff but ended nicely with the exception of Rachael completely cracking in the "mother" of all meltdowns. She and Alejandra had had a very fun afternoon, starting with a birthday party of a new friend and then onto someone elses house for a pizza gathering. Fatigue won out and she became a Chernobyl sized nuclear meltdown. However, falling asleep practically in mid scream we quietly put her to bed. On the other hand, Alejandra was a dream tonight, once again demanding good night kisses and hugs and in a slight stall for bedtime decided she wanted to sleep in the pack and play that someone left here. No problema!! She fits right in there and Grant and I had a nice quiet rest of the evening. Mothers day here is a pretty big deal here. I celebrated by going to the doctor to get antibiotics for my sinus infection. I am glad I did, hopefully by the time Grant leaves they will kick in and I will be able to fully function without an icepick in my head. Apparently there is some huge 8 hour procession on Sunday here, excuse my ignorance, but my understanding as it is a tribute to the Virgin Mary. More on that as the weekend and traffic unfold. We are crossing our fingers to be able to get Alejandra's picture and passport paperwork tomorrow. Apparently, we are waiting to see if one of the crucial documents got translated. We won't know until late morning which is a bummer as far as traveling to the city. Coming back here is going to be nightmare. We will have to decide who will go..Papi y Alejandra or Mami y Alejandra. The other thing we need to do is start prepping Alejandra that Papi is leaving on Sunday. This is going to be difficult and I am sure the back lash will be significant but what can we do? Thanks for checking in!!

Ahhh, when things go smooth!!

Tonight was someone of a turning point, one for my nose which now can breathe O2 semi-efficiently, and more importantly we had our first bedtime routine without meltdown and drama!! It may be the only one for a while but still I think Alejandra is catching on. She even wanted to kiss me goodnight!! It was a pretty big deal as she is getting more and more familiar with “time out” for bad behavior. The good news is that with each incident (of which I think she just craves structure but has to test us anyway) it seems she bounces back faster. It is giving me more confidence to handle the girls on my own when Grant leaves. Of course, there is my angel Ruth who can help me during the week. I wish I could post the pictures but the internet is just too slow. Tonight as Alejandra was helping fold laundry she puts on Grants shirt and says with her little mischievous grin..Mire!! Soy Papi!! Hola! Soy Papi!! So then Rachael joins in putting on my clothes and they dance around calling each other Mami and Papi. It was pretty cute. Alejandra is an amazing helper, organizer, and loves babies and toddlers. I call her the little Momi sometimes. She insists on doing things herself, I think I mentioned that before, but it is just so different from Rachael. After dinner tonight we were all drawing pictures at the table and she drew “her family” and pointed to the picture of each of us over and over, es mi familia, Mami, Papi, Rachael, and Alejandra!! We also drew pictures of Max, Isabelly and Nemo, which she loved. Even though she is a challenge at times, it makes my heart swell to think this little independent girl of only 4, who has had to fend for herself in an orphanage all of her life, is now embracing the fact that she has a family of her own. We also received good news that they did complete her new birth certificate today and the rest of the packet for the embassy will be translated hopefully tomorrow and Friday and then we should be submitted Monday or Tuesday. Keep you fingers crossed!! Once again, thank you so much for the individual emails, they really mean a lot!!

Lucky me, Grant gets to stay

Yes, whimpy me, talked Grant into staying. Good timing because I am having one heck of a time with the mold down here which I am highly allergic too. I am hoping that I will adjust to it without my usual mass medication. Grant will now leave early Sunday morning. We have had good news on the paperwork front. Hopefully, we will be submitted for Pink (or the Visa) on Monday. Although, I will believe when I see it. This means that they should set up our Visa appointment within 72 hours of that time. Which in turn means hopefully sometime before June we will get our appointment or sooner if somehow we can beg the embassy to let us take someone's appointment that can't make it. On the home front, in Antigua, we are doing well. Alejandra is certainly a challenge at times and very stubborn to authority but she is learning that boundaries are good and we will love her always. The communication is getting a little better. I am picking up a lot more of what she says. We have a spanish tutor coming this afternoon so hopefully I will gain more from that. We are going to a little celebration party for a new friend's son who finally exited PGN after 10 months!! UGH! They live right around the corner, an easy walk and have a 7yr old girl, Jackeline, who the girls like to play with. I will probably write more tonight. Thanks again for all the individual emails. And yes, Ruth is a saint!!! She made me some lemon tea today for my congestion and she also had a heart to heart with Alejandra yesterday on good behavior and transitioning to our family. Tomorrow they celebrate Mother's day here, so we told Ruth to take the day off to be with her family. I think we will make her a card this afteroon. We surprised her with Pollo Campero yesterday for lunch, it is her favorite ( it is the nation's craving..just like Kentucky Fried Chicken!) We miss everyone!! Janet

Sunday in Antigua

We returned to the Hotel Antigua for brunch and a day at the pool. Many other adoptive families were there and the food was excellent. Although knowing that one is going to swim right after brunch is a good deterrent from eating too much. I got smart and bought a second float, one for Rachael also, since sharing is sometimes an issue :). Both girls had a blast and Rachael made some new friends her age who have been here with their families for almost a year waiting for their children. Maria, I think, has tried to tell us that she prefers to be called "Alejandra". Tonight she kept repeating, un prompted, Alejandra Kowalchick!! Today was better with less meltdowns. I think our understanding of each other is improving. I am intently trying to pick up on her spanish and speak both spanish and english to her. She is doing better in the pool. Only one incident of near drowning, not really do to her lack of awareness but still we have to watch her like a hawk. I am so thankful that Rachael is a good swimmer and can be on her own!! Atleast, Alejandra is holding her breath now instead of drinking most of the water!! We were hoping to catch a Tuk Tuk home but no luck. So it was quite a walk with two tired girls. I am trying to talk Grant into staying through the week but we will see. I think it would help because we are making a lot of progress with her transition and I am so afraid we will take 4 steps backward if he leaves Tuesday morning. Thanks for all of the emails from home, it is great hearing from everyone when the internet is up!!

Losing Blogs!!

I typed about an hour long blog last night and lost the darn thing, gave up and went to bed. The internet here is so hit or miss. Anyway, yesterday was great as we went to the market with Ruth!! Ruth is an incredible house keeper that the woman renting the apartment before me suggested that I keep on when I arrived in Antigua. I really didn’t see the need, I didn’t have a baby to care for, the apartment is only about 600 sq ft. What would someone do from 9:30 to 2 or 3pm everyday during the week. Well, let me tell you, we are joking about trying to get two visas while we are down here!!! Ruth is amazing. She keeps the place immaculate, washes our clothes (by hand), makes an incredible lunch for us, preparing left overs ect, she goes to the market and loves kids. Of course she only speaks Spanish but we are learning!
We all went to the open air Mercado with her on Friday. The Mercado can be intimidating if not daunting as an outsider. However, Ruth led the way, knew exactly who to buy from, what to buy, what was the freshest and cheapest. I would have been completely clueless. Then she came home and made us this incredible chicken, veggie, rice soup with home made tortillas and guacamole. It was like having a Hispanic version of my friend Ninu from home who I taut as the best cook on this earth ( Helen, you run a close second!!) practically living with us. Ruth is just a really neat woman. She is 56 and has done this for many fostering families.
The other fun thing we did was meet a group of fostering families at a local restaurant for dinner. Most of them have babies all around the 7 month mark and range from being here a week to up to a year!
We went to Hotel Antigua to the pool today. It is a small hike across town but do able. The grounds are beautiful and the pool is great and heated!! Thank goodness because the girls stayed in for almost two hours.
There is also an adjacent little playground which is very nice. Maria clearly has never had the opportunity to swim other than with us or be on a playground with swings and climbing things. It is remarkable in a way to see her lack of body awareness and lack of coordination initially but she is quite determined ( if not a complete bull in a china shop) to master any task.
The pool can be a little scary with her because she has no concept that she is about a hair from drowning at any given point if you are not there to remind her to take her head out of the water! She does love it, so eventually she will get the concept.
We definitely have our challenging moments with Maria. She is very strong willed and it is so difficult because we can’t explain certain things to her, and many times our limited Spanish commands come across rather didactic I am sure. I am looking into hiring a tutor to hang out with us in the morning to help me communicate with her and for me to understand what she is saying. Like I said, we are starting the second part of our journey!!

Internet access iffy Quck update

The internet access has been come and go here and I imagine that might just be the way it is for the most part. We have settled into our apartment which is nice, modest and has everything we need. The only downside is that the walk to town is quite a ways with two kids. Doing it solo by myself is no problem and is quite nice but even with the very sturdy jogging stroller and only one parent I don’t see it happening. Right now we can manage because one of us can carry Maria if both girls are tired and Rachael who we can’t carry can ride in the stroller. So after Grant leaves that option is probably out. Our apartment sits on the far eastern side of town. It is behind the house of our wonderful landlord Ana Maria. There are two houses on the property with another apartment above ours which stays mainly vacant. The property is completely walled off and has a locked single garage door in the front with a door built in for access. The grounds are beautiful with a million different plants and flowers along the pathway back to our little place. The girls can play along the narrow corridor and the mostly empty car space toward the front. Maria is really becoming attatched to Grant. She already knows what a softy he is! It is really great to see. I am dreading when he has to leave and how that is going to affect her. Of course, it is very frustrating that we can’t understand her when she starts rambling on or speaks full paragraphs about something. She gets frustrated too. She is starting to pick up on a few words and speak them but when we are still so immersed in a Spanish speaking culture I imagine that her English will be slow until we get back home. We will not know until probably next week when we will be able to get her birth certificate done. Our attorney was supposed to make a personal trip to Maria’s home town outside the city to deliver the paperwork on a few children from the hogar either yesterday or today. At that point she should have an idea on how quickly they can be completed. Sorry I have been unable to email individually, but with having a low internet signal this is the best way to get our news out. Thanks for checking in on us!!

Finally Together!

One part of our journey is over and the other just begins!! Our trip to Guatemala was very smooth and we could not figure out why the flight was so empty, there was almost no one at the airport and there was no traffic. For those of you who have not been, all of the aforementioned are usually packed with people! It was Dia de Trabajo ( I am probably spelling that wrong), "labor day", which made it a great day to travel. We arrived at the hotel and Pedro from the hogar, our attorney's son, came to pick us up at around 11:oo am. He told us how ready Maria was and how all day yesterday she was talking non stop about us. However, I had a feeling although everything he said was probably very true, I knew when reality hit, it would be a difficult thing to deal with. Sure enough, when we drove up, all the other kids were playing and waving and Maria sat in a chair by herself with her head hung low. She bawled when she saw us! I could only imagine what was going through her mind, so many emotions, good and bad. We stayed for a while and gave our gifts to the other children, caregivers ect. I held her tight in the car while she cried on the way back to the hotel. Luckily, I brought some photos in my purse of our last visit. She would look at them between sobs. Once at the hotel it took her about 15 minutes, some chocolate and that was it. She became the Maria that we had spent time with before, happy, laughing, chasing, playing. Even better, she began instantly to bond with Grant. This was new, she had always been a little stand offish with him. Now she holds both of our hands, yells Mami, Papi, Rachael!!! Rachael is thrilled beyond belief, can't stop picking her up, sissy this, sissy that, sharing with sissy, showing her things ect. She wakes up happy, she is so much more comfortable with us this time. Before it would wax and wane a little. Now the only time she gets scared or worried is if we ride in the car or she sees our agency rep who reminds her of the hogar. Driving to Antigua to our apartment today she was terrified. She thought we were going back to the hogar. When we walked into the apartment she bawled. I know she thought we were going to leave her. But again after about 10 minutes she knew we were not leaving and she bounced right back to Maria! Ok, more on the apartment later. Had to get this out tonight for everyone I know who is thinking of us. We are so incredibly blessed with two happy girls!!